Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Sunrise with My Sister

Pastels of the early morning fill the sky. The morning sun rises above our heads, lighting our faces. We walk in unison down the pebbled path towards the lake -- the water so still it could be mistaken for glass. Our feet kicking the pebbles out of the way leaving imprints where our young feet have been. As we take the step from the pebbled path to the wooden pier, the sound of our feet becomes unmuted as the aged wood creaks. At the end of the pier we sit, our legs dangling off the edge, the water licking our delicate feet. Youth: such an innocent part of life. I tell myself how lucky I am to have a sister like you.


Author's Note - I did a stream of consciousness about the sunrise and I came up with this. It's about a walk my sister and I took in the early morning down to the lake while we were up north last summer. I would like to refine it as a poem maybe, but I'm not sure.

5 comments:

  1. This seems like it would have been a beautiful moment that you will never forget. I think it would be amazing as a poem--I would definitely work on it. Great job with your descriptive words! You did a really good job describing the scene and making a picture in my head.

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  2. I agree with what Jennifer said it is very beatiful and descriptive. however, I would really love to see this in a poem form but either way it is good. Nicely done :)

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  3. I agree with the other comments above! This is touching. I love how descriptive you were! Nice Job!

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  4. Morgstanatahh this is amazing! :) you created a really clear picture in my mind, but like everyone else said, I would love to see this as a poem. Great job. :) Lovee youuu :D

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  5. This is beatifully written, and I think you should taek a look at putting this into a poem. (Also I think you should show your sister if you haven't already.) If you want to look at this together, I'd be happy to show you how you could split this up into some lines of poetry. I'm sure you can do that on your own too :)

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